Aww man.

I may or may not have spent the last couple of hours drinking too much Red Bull and I know I said this blog would be different but WHATEVER I do what I want ;) it's my blog bitchezz!

I miss the good old days, when drinking was fun because it was illegal, eating mi goreng because that all there was, crashing at people's houses for lulz and taking drunk midnight strolls to the 24hr bakery. I miss all nighters and sleepovers with friends where all we'd do is watch scary youtube videos and struggle to fall asleep. I miss the good days of working with my friends at my old work, when really all we'd do was play soccer out the back. I miss going to town every Friday night and meeting up with friends and randomly making new ones. I miss the crazy parties that ended too soon because someone called the cops. I miss the random adventures that take you to places you'd never thought you'd be and meet people you'd never thought you'd meet. The most amazing part is that all these things I used to do with these people became my best friends, yet uni life has sucked out the awesomeness of being young and free. I don't feel free anymore, but I still feel young. I wish I was in Year 11 again, where I had the world at my feet and I didn't have to care about my future. All I cared about was the upcoming weekend. I didn't have to feel the weight of responsibility. I didn't have responsibilities. I didn't have to budget my money to pay for phone bills and petrol. I didn't have to think about a career. Life was awesome back then. Now, I sit here at my laptop, thinking how much of a screw up I am because I am not ready to grow up. I'm still a kid at heart, in fact I think I'll forever be a kid at heart. I'll always do one too many shots, say things I should probably keep to myself and wear what ever the hell I want because screw what everyone else thinks, I'll do what I want. I don't want to be boring tertiary student that lives off studying my ass off (which is probably why I deferred). I want to do things, like study Japanese, take up kick-boxing or dragon boat racing, get better at ice skating, learn Chinese brush painting, get more piercings, get tattooes, pick up my guitar again, finally learn that song on the piano I've been wanting to learn for ages and freaking bake cupcakes or something. I don't want to feel like I've already lived out the prime of my life. I'm going to spend the next 6 months of this year reading books, buying clothes and being my awesome goddamn self because although I have to grow up at some point, I am going to do it when I want and do it with style because fuck everyone, there's only one me. I don't want to die as an under-achiever, I want to be known as someone who doesn't put up with crap from others and someone who lived their life the way they wanted to, and out of all of this I'll find true happiness because as Aristotle preached, true happiness is self sufficient. Unfortunately it's taken me 18 years to realise that it doesn't matter if I'm not rich, I can still live a fulfilling and happy life with what I've got.

Kudos if you actually read this ahaha..